I Did It Again Kid Cudi
The Affect of Kid Cudi
How Scott Mescudi's Music Saved Me
I'll acknowledge, I wasn't the biggest fan of Kid Cudi at offset. While I loved his breakout single "Day N' Nite", the residue of his music fell flat for me. Maybe considering I was trying likewise hard to compare him to his contemporaries like Kendrick Lamar and Drake or perhaps I but couldn't get into his manner of psychedelic rap, but I passed on him for a while. It wouldn't be until a particular bespeak in my life where I suddenly turned to his music for guidance at a time when I needed it the almost, it's at that point where Cudi finally started to click with me and has since get one of my favourite artists of this past decade.
Let me set the stage, the year is 2015. I'chiliad about to graduate high school and start university pursuing a film studies degree (probably the most expensive mistake I've fabricated in my life thus far.). Despite that, I ever credit my commencement twelvemonth at uni as the start of my musical journeying, where I began exploring more obscure artists and musicians who I never got the hazard to listen to. My ho-hum introduction to Cudi's music started that same summer which was also the start of my introduction to marijuana. I was looking for music to vibe to while I was stoned out of my mind, mainly sticking with stuff by Jimi Hendrix, Flatbush Zombies, and Flight Lotus to name a few. Cudi's name popped upwardly plenty of times during my search for psyched-out rap, and then I gave him a shot. Information technology was the perfect music to vibe to but I still couldn't understand the entreatment. His product was incredible but his lyricism still wasn't hitting me, yet I remained optimistic.
Fast frontward a few months later, information technology'southward probably the end of Oct just a few weeks after my birthday where a strange feeling started to settle in, loneliness. Growing up every bit an introverted only kid, I was used to existence my own company, but this felt different, I started condign more broken-hearted and melancholic. Granted I've struggled with bouts of anxiety and depression earlier in the past, only now that I was spending a bulk of my days by myself commuting to school and walking around campus, those night thoughts started to creep up again. When yous have a group of friends that you constantly see you lot're distracted from those thoughts, however when you're all alone, your mind has time to bring those dorsum. Perchance the sudden shift from the stimulus of my high school environs where I had company at every angle to university'due south stress-filled weather condition might've triggered it, only I started feeling lost. I began questioning my own cocky-worth, wondering if I was making the right choices, wondering if I was making everybody happy, wondering if I was making myself happy.
That would change one day, while studying in my room I threw on Spotify and skimmed through my saved albums, and stumbled upon Man on the Moon, Vol. II: The Legend of Mr.Rager, Cudi'south 2nd album. I never listened to it in full simply I figured it'd exist a chill album to play in the background. Not thinking much but I pressed play and after the first few songs I drew my attention to the music, putting the paper I was working on aside equally I started listening to the album with total intent. With Genius by my side, I went through the songs lyric for lyric, bar for bar. Songs like "We Aite", "These Worries", and "Trapped In My Listen" started making more sense to me. They perfectly illustrated how lowly I had become, my attempts to cope with myself. Even the album's cover art depicting Cudi sitting by himself spoke to how I was feeling. Then I went on a full marathon after, going through all his albums during the next few days. The more I listened, the more I began to relate.
My stride came to a full end when I revisited "Day N' Nite". I liked it before when I get-go watched the music video as a 12-year-onetime in 2009, unaware of the song'south deeper meaning, but going dorsum as an 18-yr-old trying to discover myself again it hit me like a ton of bricks. The vocal was describing me. The lone stoner who only seemed to complimentary his mind at night, the Mr. Solo Dolo, was actually me. What I initially thought was a song to just chill and relax to, was actually the pitiful tale of Cudi dealing with his own hurting and tribulations, and it couldn't aptly describe me at that time, even the "me" right now writing this, better than whatever other song I had heard.
I've e'er pointed to music at times when words couldn't draw a state of affairs, and at that point Cudi was helping me cope and chronicle my ain personal struggle. I can gladly say that afterwards that moment I began looking at myself in a different light, and Kid Cudi was the soundtrack to that enlightenment. His music would have the aforementioned effect on me again three years later when Cudi teamed upwardly with Kanye West for their collab album KIDS Meet GHOSTS, an album dedicated to Cudi and Ye's ain battles with mental health. I can vividly remember driving downwardly the highway blasting "Reborn" and "Freeee". I had a huge smile with tears of joy running down my face every bit I reflected back to when I was that lonesome 18-year sometime, and how better my life and my own mentality had get. I finally felt free from the shackles I weighed myself downward with.
It was at that betoken that I became a Kid Cudi fan. His music was and continues to exist therapy for me. His music has helped me cope with my ain struggles with mental health, providing me a healthier artery to deal with them, and making me more comfortable about opening up to friends and family nigh my personal struggles. Above all else, Scott fabricated information technology okay to non be okay. His music did for me what bands similar Linkin Park, Nirvana, and Bring Me The Horizon did for me as an angsty teen. Cudi helped me have myself, helped me battle the anxiety, low, and loneliness I had felt at the time. Scott was the big blood brother I needed to reassure me that everything was going to be fine. Anybody who has dealt with mental health struggles knows that they don't just go away, simply you find ways to manage them, and over time things will go better. At a time when I needed it most, when I was unsure of myself and my place on this world, Scott Mescudi was there for me.
"Information technology'south gon' be okay, trust me. It's gon' be okay"
— Kid Cudi
Source: https://medium.com/the-riff/the-impact-of-kid-cudi-3322c68d2830
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